how do I

I am not afraid of women but, people portray me so,
There are many admires,some secret, other live,
Flirting is getting me annoyed,how would you feel if;
A girl with good morals suddenly become a good girl turned bad?
I thought she loved me, I was so in love, I would fight with my family,
Congregants over what they had realised,before me,was nothing but,
Infatuation. I was escorting my mother one spring money,there she was;
Sitting pretty under another man's armpits,a contract worker, I thought to myself,
Why isn't his smell disgust her? she glanced at me,walked away,not until,
She removed his arm from her shoulders.I said nothing either,
A beavy of beauties were bouncing right in front of me,
I had forgotten where my mother was.Our love was now gone forever,
I used to lie to myself while lying on a bed by myself; She and I will have a
Yard full of children. Warning bells should have rung at the back of my mind when:
I was being scolded in church for overlooking her while, I questioned her loyalty to me.
Now I am view as a con-man by almost every body who crosses my path,
How do I commit to someone whose words slithers out of her mouth,hisses whenever
the truth is revealed? She has a man and a son in kindergarten school, I got almost,nothing.